Why do I like concerts?

Many people have asked me, why do you like concerts so much? Why is this experience such a draw for you? I've been wanting to write about this for a while.

Looking back on growing up, I've realized that I've always loved the type of music that is in a strong 4/4 beat (at least I think that's what it is. I'm not a musician). Something that made me want to dance. It speaks to me on a primal level. And generally, the harder the beat, the better. I can't explain why I like it, I just do. I know it when I hear it. It can be any genre.

When I was a really very young (like, 4), I remember my dad playing Olivia Newton John's album Totally Hot on the stereo, and when Gimme Some Lovin' came on, I always got so excited. I remember getting all my dad's shoes and putting them in a big circle on the rug and then running and jumping over the shoes like hurdles in time to the beat. Listen to the song and you can see how this is totally doable! I also loved it when he played our ABBA records, some mexican cumbia music that he had on reel to reel, and a handful of country songs that came on the radio like Elvira from the Oak Ridge Boys and I Love a Rainy Night by Eddie Rabbit, Music Box Dancer by Frank Mills, and even the Chicken Dance. All of those songs have a great beat that I was just drawn to.

Later on I discovered pop music, and tended toward the top 40 stations because that seemed to be the best choice that wasn't Mexican, easy listening, oldies or hard rock. At the time, Top 40 in the early 80's was actually decent. Shannon. Dead or Alive. Eurythmics. Falco. Wham! Erasure. These were some of my favorites. If you actually listen to all of these, you will notice they all have a similar driving, danceable beat.

I was sorely uneducated in music however, so if I were to go to the record store, I wouldn't know what to buy. I didn't want to waste money (not that I had any money to spend anyway) if I bought something and ended up only liking the one song I had heard on the radio. I got a boombox for my 14th birthday which had the capability to record songs directly from the radio onto cassette. It actually took me a while to realize that this was possible, because before then I used to record via microphone from my clock radio onto a portable cassette recorder.

So I started recording my favorite songs from the radio onto cassette, thereby making my own "mixtapes" before I even knew what that was. Then I could listen to my favorite songs all the time without having to buy them!

An enduring problem, 30 years later.

Meanwhile, my longest known friend Carrie who is about a year and a half older than I am had always liked "weird music". When we spent time together (which was rare), I got exposed to bands like The Cure, Depeche Mode, The Violent Femmes, David Bowie (whom she declared she was "in love with" at the age of 7), Eurythmics, The Judys, R.E.M, Kate Bush, The Smiths, The B-52's. I liked some of the music (most notably Depeche Mode) but didn't know how to discover it, where to find it, where to listen to it. They didn't play very much of it on the radio. I was intrigued by the rarity and obscurity of it. The cool factor. The danceable beats (in most cases), and the fact that it sounded "different". I wanted to learn more about it, but didn't quite know how.

Carrie and I in 2010

When I was a senior in high school, I was helping to decorate the lockers after school for Homecoming, and - I don't remember how it happened exactly. Maybe I overheard someone talking about it, but I learned about a radio show that was on a public radio station (KXCR - kind of ironic that they are a Christian station now) on Sunday nights that played this obscure music. I was so excited! That weekend I started listening to Stepping Out (←theme music) - hosted by Joe Dorgan, the owner of Club 101 in my hometown El Paso plus a few of his DJs (Hi Ceasar) and some other rotating hangers on, and I continued listening to this show devotedly for the next 5 years. I was even invited to the station once. Another show started up somewhere during that time called BackTrax, DJ'd by "Moose" (whom I dated like, once) that played "classic new wave" which added to my repertoire of knowledge. While I was in college, another "station", which was not over the air but was a re-incarnation of an actual historical radio Station in El Paso, started up called KVOF (Hi Matt) that also played this, now called "Alternative" music in the Student Union. I was obsessed with all of them. I couldn't get enough 😉

Ceasar Flores - Club 101 DJ

His band X-21 was the first CD I ever bought. The club supported many local acts through the years.

L.I.M. or, The Lost Industry of Music.

Ulcer was from Las Cruces and gained a little bit of national attention. They produced 2 albums.

Got the T-shirt!

I was finally able to listen to and learn about this music that just spoke to me. I recorded hundreds of tapes from the radio. I still have these tapes, and still plan to get them digitized some day. I know Joe, you have been waiting for many years. Maybe I can get some help?

I have about 130 of these total, a majority of which are Stepping Out, recorded from 1990 - 1995

This notebook contains every song recorded on those tapes. #49 through #101 have dates.

My first concert ever was ZZ Top that I attended with my dad when I was 17 for the Recycler album. The show was spectacular, even though we had nosebleed seats. It was so BIG. Moving sidewalks across the stage. Lazer lights that formed pictures that floated across the ceiling. Fog machines. Puppets. Big Screens. Dancing girls. A big set full of broken up cars. Costume changes. Blacklights and glowing spinning guitars! I was in awe. The feeling I got from that experience was a feeling of pure joy. A fluttery, awe inspired bliss. So, I had had a taste.

Since Stepping (Steppin'?) Out was run by Joe Dorgan who happened to also book concerts at his club, I started learning about concerts from these "new" artists. They weren't new bands, just new to me. I started going to the club regularly with my friend Lisa when I was barely old enough to get in as it was an 18 and up club. When I heard that one of the bands I had come to like from listening to the show was coming to town, I went. My 2nd concert ever. The band was called Dessau and the year was probably 1992. I also saw bands in those early days such as Anything Box (Huge in El Paso) and Cause & Effect. I also saw U2 at the Sun Bowl which hadn't seen a concert at all in 25 years. Those were some of my very first shows.

The dance music and the intense cool factor of all of this, plus the experience of watching an artist I like re-create their own music literally right in front of me just had me hooked. I love the high I get from dancing, and the thrill of seeing a great band play. The lights, the driving beat. I rarely ever drank when I went to the club. I never did any drugs at all. I didn't need it. All the rest was enough.

The building used to be painted black. I don't have any photos of that unfortunately. It was painted grey some time later and the door was moved to the other side of the building on the left side of this picture.

A movie called "Committed" was filmed at the club. They used both the bar area and the upstairs room (which was used rarely) in the movie.

I feel like I came late to the party, having learned about this kind of obscure, counterculture "Alternative" music rather late, relative to other people I knew who were into it way before me (I was going to say friends, but they weren't really my friends other than Carrie, otherwise I would have been much more aware of it much earlier. They were just acquaintances). Having access to this radio show, going to the club, and going to these shows just made me feel, finally, so cool. So "with it". I was finally in the know. One of the cool kids.

To this day, it's a thing I'm still chasing.

The radio show and the club itself were really my only venues for access. I had no other way. I used to be pretty dorky. Very goody two shoes. I was called Miss Priss, Pollyanna, and The Pink Lady by mean people at school. I longed to be cool. This was a ticket out of that in a sense, but I also found something I'm passionate about. Throughout the years I've found other kindred souls who share the same passion, both for concerts in general and for Depeche Mode. We are all misfits. We don't fit in. I think we are all chasing the same thing. That feeling, that high you get when you go to a show. Being with people who understand you. People who love cutting edge, counter culture, progressive dance music. People who love to dance. People who love obscure, weird things.

I calculated it recently, and I spend about $1,000 a year on live shows. If I add in travel for the few times I've traveled out of town to see a show, it's much more than that.

Most of us have something that we love or are passionate about, be it knitting or sports cars or cosplay. Things outside of work that we learn about or spend time and money on because we enjoy them. It's something that I find very attractive in a person - being intensely passionate about something. Anything.

I feel very at home at a concert or at a dance club. Not just any concert or dance club though. I've been to some that feel truly alien to me because of the type of music or crowd that is there. It's this music that I discovered as a result of finding Stepping Out...this obscure, alternative, insanely cool music and others like me who love it is what I call Home. I was at Club 101 almost every week for several years. If my house was burning, I would grab my cat and those tapes.

I'm not sure Joe realizes how important he is to who I am today. How he is pretty much single-handedly responsible for creating the venue which enabled me to discover and experience this thing that I love so much, and find people who shared my passion for it. This lifestyle. This incredible music that I love. Thank you Joe (who is incidentally a huge Depeche Mode fan. DM is even the inspiration for Club 101 itself and it's logo). I will be forever grateful to you for that.

I dug through my concert photos from back in the day. These are some of the best ones I had. Of course cameras were film only and getting good pics was difficult. Click a photo for a slideshow.

Anything Box played often